Am I really going to do this?

So I just got off the phone with the woman who teaches the writing class at the local library. I was all excited to finally make the leap and do something more structured with my writing. So I finally got the baby down for his nap, grabbed the phone and dialed....eh.

First of all, her name is Hertha, second, she sounds about a thousand years old. Yes, yes, ageism, blah, blah, J.D. Salinger was ninety-one, blah, blah. But I'm not looking to be J. D. Salinger. An amazing an author though he was, I'm not cut out to be a serious literary type. I just write funny stories about my kids and curse.

Anyway, Methusela, I mean Hertha, goes on to describe the class. There are ten students right now and each week students share their writing aloud, either from an assignment or from a piece of personal interest. One student, for example is working on an autobiography, another, a short story. An autobiography? Really? Who are you, Ted Kennedy? See? I'm already judging and this does not bode well.

My fear is this class is full of old people. Again, ageist, but I can picture this old coot in his suspenders and belt offering up his critique, "She swears too much. It's filth!", while angrily wiping spittle from his mouth with a handkerchief. I'm not sure a suburban library class is going to get me, or more to the point, my snark, unless, by some miracle, there are some women my age in attendance.

So, do I go? Don't I? Adding to the burden of this decision, is the fact the class starts at six o'clock. - way before H even gets on a train back to Jersey, and prime crazy-time at Chez Mean Mommy. So not only would it mean getting a sitter, but throwing said sitter right into the fire, never mind a stop in the frying pan.

And then this quote from You've Got Mail (which I am quoting most often lately- weird), popped into my head,
"Sometimes I wonder about my life. I lead a small life - well, valuable, but small - and sometimes I wonder, do I do it because I like it, or because I haven't been brave? So much of what I see reminds me of something I read in a book, when shouldn't it be the other way around? I don't really want an answer. I just want to send this cosmic question out into the void."

I will keep you posted.