It's not her damn wedding!

So it has been one year since our return to the fold, and the Super Bowl of Catholicism is rapidly approaching. First Communion. Dun, dun, dunnnnn.

I remember my own First Communion (FC) being a pretty big deal in my seven-year-old life. CCD classes ramped up in frequency, there was a party to plan, and there were endless Saturdays spent shopping for the dress, the veil and the shoes. Now that #1 is preparing for FC as well, I plan on continuing the low-key way we have approached religion so far, and taking this whole thing with a grain of salt, and not believing the hype. Fighting the rising tide of Eucharist-induced hysteria is proving difficult, however, as I attend mandatory parent meetings where parents anxiously wait to be informed of the date of their child’s FC like their SAT scores, so they can book the country club for their 200 person reception.

So this past Saturday, I thought I was reasonably ahead of the game, it being January, and decided, after stopping at the local wine shop, to pop across the street into a little children's boutique that carries FC-wear, for a little look-see. Boy, was I in for a shock.

First of all, the place was packed. Two girls were already being fitted in the back “Communion Area”, that looked like a miniature Kleinfeld’s. While #1 and I waited (yes, I brought her with me to buy wine, but, to be fair, we were coming straight from gymnastics), the owner asked what church we were with and what date was our mass. I thought this was polite conversation, until she whipped out a color-coded binder and said, “Good, I have no one for that date.” Asking what she meant, she explained, “I generally don’t sell two of the same dress for the same mass. If you are dead set on a dress that has already been purchased, I can call the other mother and see if she’ll agree to the sale. If she doesn't, I can’t sell it to you.”

And this is where I question this whole religion thing yet again.

To be fair, there are plenty of parents who are not bat-shit crazy and would not care if another girl was in the same dress as their daughter. I guess if you pay $500 for a dress you want to get your money’s worth of attention. But even my seven year-old saw the ridiculousness of this practice, telling me as we left, “I don’t want to shop at a mean store.”

Saturday’s interaction makes me dread this whole experience. I am looking for a simple, low-key dress, to go with the simple, low-key party we will have. I am not looking for a miniature version of bridal couture (#1 however, is hell bent on rhinestone trim and I had to explain the phrase “over my dead body”). I am also struggling with the whole veil thing. To me, it has child-bride connotations that I'm not quite comfortable with, but then I remember how in love I was with mine and didn’t want to take it off. So do I push my own aesthetics on my child and force her to wear a crown of flowers or give in?

So not much has changed in the past year since returning to the church. I am still crippled with indecision, at least this time it’s just about fashion. And adding insult to injury, when I told #1 she gets a special gift for FC, thinking she would request something akin to the pink, Huffy, Sweet Thunder I bike I got for the same occasion, she hits me with, “I want to get my ears pierced. And can I get hoops?”

Oh, sweet Jesus…