Look what I just found! I was cleaning out some boxes today and I stumbled a upon these. No, these are not rejects from the Salem Witch Trial reenactment wardrobe closet, these, dear reader are my wedding shoes.
I know! Can you believe Mean Mommy ever put such monstrosities on her feet even in jest, never mind on the most important day of her young life? Notice the oh, so flattering stacked heel. Were orthopedic shoes not available in white? And what's with the height of this "heel" (I use quotation marks since I now consider anything under three inches to be practically a flat)? I was young, I should have been teetering around on at least four inches.
This is yet more evidence that brides today have it so good with the way the wedding industry has been taken over by haute couture. I look at all the delicate, strappy heels I see brides wearing today and I want to cry, having missed out on such glorious footwear for my own nuptials and clomped around in, what might as well have been, giant boxes on my feet. Who the hell needs a pedicure when you are wearing shoes you can scrabble up Plymouth Rock in? And I did have a cute pedi - my toes wear my something blue.
So hear my sighs, dear readers, as I look back on a missed opportunity to wear fabulous footwear funded by my very generous father. Every bride wonders if her own daughter will wear her wedding dress some day, and while I can still do that since my dress was quite lovely, I know for certain my daughters will wear my wedding shoes, as these are being relegated to the dress-up box.
2 comments:
Wow!
I recall loving these shoes, and thinking they were oh-so-stylish. I feel personally responsible for having allowed you to commence your married life in these clod-hoppers! It might have been better if I'd just loaned you my Doc Maartens and called it a day!
You've come a long way since then, no doubt.
I'm afraid to look in the bottom of my shoe closet. I'm sure some similarly ill-advised pairs are lurking.
Molly
LOL! They're not THAT bad. I accessorized my haute couture wedding gown with a lovely pair of strappy high heeled sandals that I found in one of those shoe warehouse stores for $30. They were perfect and my dad very much appreciated my restraint in that one area. :)
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