Tuesday, November 4, 2008

The Very Hungry Mommy...



An adaptation from the book by Eric Carle. Dedicated to all the parents out there who subsist solely on the rejects from their children's plates and that which can be grabbed by the handful and who, like that caterpillar, make up for it with a vengeance on the weekends.

In the light of the moon a Mommy was awakened by her children.

Before the sun came up, POP!, out of bed came a tired and very hungry Mommy.

She started to look for some food.

On Monday she ate through one cold grilled cheese, but she was still hungry.
On Tuesday she ate through half of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, but she was still hungry.
On Wednesday she ate through one freezer-burned Lean Cuisine, but she was still hungry.
On Thursday she ate through three leftover soy nuggets, but she was still hungry.
On Friday she ate through one yogurt, slightly past its expiration date, but she was still hungry.

On Saturday, she ate through one bagel with cream cheese, half a chocolate donut, one Panera Chicken Frontega sandwich, one Strabuck's M&M cookie, one pumpkin spice latte, one order of fried calamari, one order of steak frites, one slice of carrot cake and five glasses of wine.

That night she had a stomachache.

On Sunday she at through one nice, green salad and after that she felt much better.

Now she was still tired, but she wasn't hungry anymore. She was a hungover and bloated Mommy. So she built a cocoon for herself out of her down comforter and sent her kids to the park with their Daddy.
A few hours later the family came back to check on their Mommy, pulled back the edge of the comforter and she was...

Asleep.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Nicely done. I much prefer your version to the real one. I'm pretty sure my list of food would be way longer sadly.

Anonymous said...

Absolutely hysterical