Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Everything I needed to know, I knew in third grade...

During the long weekend, which only made me wish for summer more, having all the kids home, H and I sat down to have a movie night with the girls. We have them including Little Man too, but rather than sitting on the couch snuggled together, it becomes a scream-fest involving repeated shouting of, "SIT DOWN, LM!" and the girls whining, "Can you get him out of the way of the TV?".

We sat down to watch The Bridge to Terabithia, breaking my read-it-before-you-see-it rule, which would have come in really handy, since never having read the book myself, I didn't know one of the main characters dies in the middle of the movie causing me to mouth to H, over the girls' heads, "What the fuck?". Waterworks, aka as #1, handled it well though, unlike Toy Story 3, which has been banned in our house since we saw it this summer. And while it did teach me to read the preview in its entirety before watching a movie with your children, what I came away with was a vow to be more of my nine year-old self.

For my male readers, or for those of you not fortunate enought to have a girl in the eight to twelve year-old range in your lives, this time is probably the best in a girl's life. The early childhood years are behind her and she has mastered the basics that once held her back - reading, riding a bike, jigsaw puzzles with more than twelve pieces. She is reading books that expose her to knew ideas and she is coming up with a few of her own. Everything she does she does with gusto, becoming fuly obsessed with horses, writing, or drawing.

The world is the nine year-old's oyster. She can be anything she wants to be. My oldest currently wants to be a teacher and a vet on the weekends. And also, a mom, which I am glad she lists as an occupation. Nothing is impossible. She has not yet learned about compromise and sacrifice for the sake of others, which seems to come with territory of womanhood.

The nine year-old's body is a strong powerful tool to get her around the world she is ready to conquer. No longer held back by the unsure steps of a pre-schooler, she runs with abandon, feeling her heart pound just for the sheer joy of it, as coltish as the horses most of them so dearly love. Her body hasn't yet become something to change and shape and mold, wishing parts bigger and smaller as the case may be. Her body is to be lived in, not to be looked at.

I look at my daughter and I want for her to keep growing and learning, but in so many ways I wish she could stay just as she is right now. In many ways, she is wiser than I. Her passions drive her and each day is an adventure. She is confident in her being, not questioning her choices or what she is doing. She is just fine the way she is. And then, in the blink of an eye, it can all change.

So this week I have tried my best to put the Swiffer away and write - and not feel guilty about it. Rather than sprint intervals, I ran at whatever pace felt good this morning, listening to music that made me smile. Which included Lady Gaga's new single "Born This Way". You could almost see a nine year-old writing these lyrics, "I'm beautiful in my way, 'Cause God makes no mistakes, I'm on the right track baby, I was born this way."

Most of us women start out as strong, confident little girls, who are excited to take over the world. She's still in there if you look. Wouldn't be amazing if you let her out?

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Love, love, love this post. 3rd and 4th grade were the best years of my childhood. You are so right on the mark with this one.
B.