During Back to School Night last week, the principal was discussing what the school is doing to meet the state standard for physical activity. My kids are very lucky, since not only do they have Gym twice a week (although #2 insists on still calling it Physical Education, I'm sure at the urging of her Napoleon-like gym teacher), but the principal has them run or walk laps around the playground for ten minutes at the beginning of recess. And while I think they are lucky, I'm sure they think all this exercise business is a pain in the ass, as I did in school. And this brought back a memory - The Presidential Physical Fitness Test.
How many of you remember that torture? In my memory, it was only in high school, but it couldn't have been, could it? I'm not even sure they do it anymore and Googling it didn't bring up anything concrete. There were several events and various, embarrassing moments associated with them, that stand out in my mind though - feel free to add to the list in the comments please.
1. Running - There were several runs of different lengths in this category, some long and some short. I sucked at both. While I have become a runner in my thirties, even in high school I was never fast. I'm more of an endurance athlete, let's say. H says it's because I'm stubborn. What probably did not help in high school? The fact that I barely changed my clothes for PE, and wearing an underwire bra, cut-off sweat-shorts and Candies tennis shoes did not set me up to be the next Flo Jo. And the poor fat kid. I would always avert my eyes and try to get involved in some distracting conversation to avoid seeing and hearing people make fun of him as he huffed and puffed around the track. My heart still cries at the memory. Meh.
2. Shuttle Run - If you thought you were humiliated running outside, wait until you have to fling yourself as fast as you can across the gym, bend over to grab an eraser on the floor (did the gym teacher have to borrow those?), quickly change direction and head back to the start to drop the eraser and do it again - twice. Again, my shoes? Not helping. I ran into that particle-board-folding-dividing-wall-thingy more times that I can count.
3. Sit Ups - How many sit ups can you do in a minute? I have no idea, but it has to be more than I could do in high school, as I would have H to hold my feet, and not be crippled by the anxiety that the kid who sits behind me in AP Chem is going to see my undies as I lay on the floor in front of him. Oddly sexual, no? After this particular activity half the student body couldn't walk upright or laugh without excruciating pain.
4. Long Jump - Standing in place, swinging your arms at your sides, jump as far forward as you can. What exactly is this a test of? Your ability to imitate The Million Dollar Man? White girls can't jump! Regardless, my senior year, I almost killed myself trying to get a high enough score on long jump since, getting an %85 average on the PPFT, and playing a varsity sport, got you out of gym for the year! (And, if you must know, it was field hockey and all I did was run away from the ball and try to look cute in my kilt.) Having scored so poorly on the other parts of the test, long jump was my last hope. I even came back during lunch to keep trying to up my score. Eventually, I did and I couldn't walk fora week. Got me out of hockey practice though.
5. The Bar Hang - You fellas might remember this one as Pull Ups. This was my most abysmal performance of the whole test. For the gals, you stand on a chair, holding onto the pull up bar, palms facing away from you, and you are timed to see how long you can hang. This test was the realm of the tiny, gymnastics/dance squad girls, five foot three and under. Me? Picture the teacher having to forcibly drag the chair out from under me with my legs still firmly planted on it as my body is stretched out slowly away from the wall. Upper body strength? What is that? Too bad I didn't have Little Man back then, because he has helped me develop some guns.
So here's one more thing to make you grateful high school is over. But considering I feel like I'm in better shape now (considering I actually exercise and consume more than soda and Chips Ahoy all day) I might actually have a chance of legitimately passing. Except maybe not the long jump. With three kids, I can't afford to be a cripple.
3 comments:
LOL! We did it in elementary, middle AND high school. I remember it all too well. I never could do more than one pull-up and still can't. And remember the stretch where you put your feet against a box and reached out as far as you could along the ruler on the box? Flexibility or something. So ridiculous.
I am proud/sad to say in 8th grade I was the first female physical fitness leader elected in my class. Got to wear a special green shirt and help the teacher during gym. Highlight of my middle school career. :)
of course i remember this! though they didn't have this in private school (you had to play an actual sport ever semester).
I have to admit I kind of loved all of it because I tested so high. Except, of course, for the dreaded bar hang, a humiliating experience for a chubby natural athlete.
I also recall the flexibility test where you had to put your feet up against a box with an extended tray. Then you put one hand on top of another and reached towards the tray hoping you landed your hands on a respectable number like "7".
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